No need to visit
we'll all meet at Disneyland
forgo inferno.

what is being gained
is more than what we're leaving
that's always the hope.

Come, grab your lasso
let the adventure begin!
We are not afraid!

We spent Memorial Day weekend at Lake Osoyoos on the border of Washington and Canada. On the way back, we were driving through these insanely pretty valleys of apple orchards and Chad suggests we become apple farmers. We talked about what it would cost to start up a farm, paying for land and equipment and apple grafts, but ultimately decided that I don't want to raise kids in such a small town. It's been an odd few months; we're trying really hard to stay upright as life is pounding us down pretty relentlessly. But what will fix it all? This is what I would like to accomplish in the next 10 years:

buy a house
Move to AZ
have a chicken coop and a garden
get a nicer car
finish my degree
have a cutie little family
have Chad get a job he really loves

That's it. It's crazy how my goals and aspirations for life narrowed down to the most suburban and predictable things. I used to want to be be so...interesting. I wanted to wear interesting clothes and have interesting hobbies (accordion, anyone?), and listen to the most obscure music, write the saddest songs, ride the prettiest bikes. I wanted to concoct adventures and have vast collections of obscure or pedestrian things a la Amelie. I see beauty in things that you don't. I am affected. I read more than all of you. Blah, blah blah. It's all so tiring.

A few weeks ago I read a quote by the great Mark Frauenfelder of BoingBoing in response to the question, "What's something you know now about happiness that you didn't know when you were 18 years old?" His response is exactly how I feel:

When I was 18 I thought that I had to go out and find things to make me happy. Now I am happiest when I don't venture past my property line. There is a world of adventure in my house and yard -- books, my family, drawing and painting, making yogurt, sauerkraut, and kombucha, beekeeping, raising chickens, making things. I still enjoy going out and seeing the rest of the world, but I also am at the point where I am never bored by staying home. Life gets more interesting as I grow older.

I want to experience things because they make me feel good. I think one of the major burdens of our generation is finding sincerity in our actions- choosing to do things because you want to do them and not because it would make a great blog post or Facebook album.
I will go on bike rides, have movie nights, walk around Greenlake and eat really great food. I will listen to music that makes me feel good, some of which is on the wrong side of cool, even the ironic type: Huey Lewis, Phil Collins, Joanna Newsom, The White Album, Bon Iver, NMH. I will read books that I like, not ones that I'm supposed to like (ahem, Chuck Palahniuk). I go to church because it feels right and good, not to prove a point that you can be a democrat and religious. And to include a level of schmaltz heretofore unseen on this blog, I'm just going to put it out there-- I just want to hang out with Chad. Everything we do, I want to do because we're together and that's what makes it fun. I want to paddle through the Arboretum and sleep in on Saturdays and go to Target for paper towels together. It's what makes me feel good and complete and interesting and I am wholly aware at how fortunate we are for that.

If there was one thing I could tell myself when I was 18, I think it would be very similar to what I would tell my 19 year old sister:

Don't be afraid to spend time alone. That makes it easier to emphasize quality over quantity of your friends. Don't try to be interesting- read the books and listen to the music and spend time doing the things you actually enjoy. Forget all about Polaroid film. Don't buy an accordion. Don't get a credit card. Don't think he's the best you can do. Call your parents more. Do more street art.

This video was shot the night after we got married, a reprise of the song I sang Chad at our reception. The sounds of little kids yelling in the background, the bright orange toy in the shot, the general pitchiness of the vocals would have made me very unhappy before, but now I think it's just perfect.

It is all good. All of it.

Hey Megan, remember that one time we made you a painting with kitties all over it because you love kitties and it was titled, "Boots...NO!" because the little kitty wading in the water is going to get attacked by the HUGE, EVIL, MOUNTAIN CAT!? Yep, me too. Anyway, I hope you like Utah and I hope you are kissing nice boys and none that wear lady pants or have hipster mustaches, because, really, who needs those guys?

Meow, Wendy

So, basically...

Chad wins the most bitchingly awesome Easter basket award.

I love the DOG the BOUNTY HUNTER-like mullet on my little yellow bird. And it sparkles (just like DOG's)

I know it looks like the Easter basket of a 6-year-old, but I give the people what they want. And that is Spree, Rocket Balloons and Hot Wheels. Since we both have no patience, we swapped baskets at Midnight. We also had a sleepover in the living room and watched LOTR. So, Chad had just gotten Hot Wheels, was watching Gandalf and Frodo, and laying next to a girl. NERD HEAVEN.

We lazed around all Sunday and watched conference and napped. We had a few friends over for dinner which included some stinging nettles that we foraged from the park before dinner. This is my first foraging foray (please pardon/applaud the alliteration), and it was so cool. I bought some nettles at the farmer's market a couple of weeks ago and put them in a quiche, and it turned out great. It was interesting to seek out and pick and eat a plant that I avoid and curse every time I see. For dinner, I just blanched them and served them as a side, and while they didn't sting my throat (thanks to the blanching), they weren't exactly to die for, unless you like your greens wilted and soggy. Much better in soups and tarts, I think. Tess and her awesome midwife sister Bri (Bree? Brie? mmm) foraged two big bags full to dry for tea. I'd like to publicly apologize for wanting to talk non-stop about home-births during dinner and using words including, but not limited to: massive tearing, perineum, poop, crap, turds, bloody poo water, etc. I'm really interested in possibly doing a home birth, but as you can see, I'm sort of fixated on one particularly gross part of the childbirth experience.

The rest of the evening was spent dyeing eggs and playing the new game I got Chad. The rocket balloons were the surprise hit of the night actually, and provided many minutes of spit-sharing fun for us and our friends. It was great.

Also, I embarked on a more-difficult-than-I-would-ever-have-imagined sewing project that has kicked my booty. I think I'm such a know-it-all because my mom taught me how to sew scrunchies in the 5th grade. On the quilting forums that I consulted before I began this project, everyone said, "DO NOT BIND A QUILT WITH SATIN!" I understand that satin can be an unforgiving fabric to work with, but then again, it's soft and shiny. How bad could it be, really? The answer, I came to find out, is really, really bad. It's a mess. Enough of a mess that justified a trip to The Fabric Store I Hate to get a seam-ripper to try to salvage what I can. I'll post pictures soon, maybe.

Anyway, Happy Spring to all!

I know you check my blog everyday from work and see if I've posted.

I never do.

But I will post today to say thank you for the most lovely, dainty-lady presents that you gave me, on this, the second Valentine's day of our married life.

I hope you liked the hot-pink lemon cookies I made you tonight.

I love, love, love the jewelry box you gave me. A beautiful, vintage, darkwood with red velvet lining. It fits all of my lovely-lady jewels perfectly.

I also love the awesome vintage glove box. It's lined with lace and just perfect.

Last Valentine's Day, we were waiting in the Cancun airport for our plane to leave. We had more than 2 hours to wait, and we passed the time by taking turns buying presents for each other. I got you a GORGEOUS tile with horses galloping across, to display in the satillo tiled breakfast nook we would someday have in New Mexico, where I would wear clothing from Maya Palace (google it) and wear large amulets as necklaces. I also got you one of those head-shaking turtles and a rainbow pencil with a foam shark pencil topper that was wearing earmuffs and had a block of cheese for eyes.

You got me a little harbor seal with a fancy sombrero. You thought the price was in pesos, not dollars, which explains why you spent $40 on a small stuffed animal and a hat. The chin strap on the hat broke as soon as you bought it and Juan, our little seal, has a place of honor atop the bookshelf in our office. His little eyes are so irresistible, aren't they?

Writing any blog or journal is as much for your kids and grandkids as it is for you and your family and friends. So, I want to tell my future kids that our first two Valentine's Days as a married couple were excellent. We had so much free-time and money and fun until you came along, sweet children.

Just kidding. mostly.

This weekend marks the one year anniversary of the day Chad and I sealed the deal. At the risk of sounding too poetic, it's really been a totally awesome year. In it, we:

Got married, duh

Went to Mexico

Moved from out starter studio into a indulgent 2 bedroom apartment.
Went to Arizona twice to visit family
Went to Utah once to visit friends
Went camping twice (shi-shi beach and some other place in Eastern WA)

Went white-water rafting
Ate duck
Made macarons that were consistently edible

I started school full-time
Chad was re-organized at work into a position that he LOVES from a position that, well, he didn't exactly love so much.
Moved into a new ward with some seriously incredible friends (I'm looking at you, Judkins' & MacD's)
Got LOST together
Bought and killed two goldfish, one after another
Gave up trying to keep a goldfish alive
Made each other's birthday cakes, both were awesome

Went to six flags and rode roller coasters until we were sick
Got car insurance and updated tabs/title
Got, then cancelled Netflix
Hosted Thanksgiving dinner
Had our first Christmas as a married couple
Painted an enormous credenza together without filing for divorce (BRAG)

Cooked, cleaned, laughed, kissed on the mouth, held hands, had a two week lapse in judgement that made us decide to have a baby right away
Came to our senses
Cancelled our iPhones, rejoiced, moved to Verizon, rejoiced
Attacked every issue, every problem as a united, unbreakable force
Fell in love, then in some more, then in some more

For our anniversary, Chad bought me a beautiful antique ring. He said he wants to make it our tradition to get a new ring every year that we're married, which I, of course, have no objection to. Chad knows I know I love everything gaudy and sparkly, and this ring is no exception. It's beautiful. We got it at the antique mall that is almost annoyingly vast and well-stocked. It is the store that I will miss the most when we move from here.

We're giving serious thought to packing up our lives and moving back to the Motherland. We love it here; Seattle is like a sweet salve on my yearning for bustle, busy, and short walking distances. But we're living a very indulgent life here, and when we start popping out those babies, they deserve grandparents and cousins and a yard. There are better things to spend a half-million dollars on than a condominium, methinks. We are biding our time, intoxicated by the hope of leaving the romance and excitement of Seattle for the much more romantic, much more exciting prospect of planting the roots of our family into dry, dusty, southwest soil for good.

So thank you, Chad, for the most lovely first year of marriage that one could ask for. Thank you for doing the dishes and always finding the keys and always kissing me goodbye before you leave in the morning, even though I don't always remember it. You're the most bad-ass husband that exists. Truth.

Lovelovelove.

parties and pastries are what make December the best. we've got such lovely friends.

Ever since the GREAT PURPLE POM-POM EXPLOSION of 2009, I haven't been able to get enough of them. To wit:

Our Christmas branch cluster-cuss. Merry Christmas!